Peace of mind and Self love

Habang nagpe-pray kami kanina ewan ko ba bigla ko nalang naisip ang topic na ito, baka sign from God or maaring siguro kasi palagi sinasabi sakin ng friend ko na bigo ngayon na buti padaw ako merong self love, hindi niya alam selfish lang ako char!

Truth be told madame muna akong pinagdaanan bago ko na-achieve ang ganitong level of peace and love sa sarili ko akala ng lahat napakadali lang yun gawin but in reality madame sa atin ang kinulang sa pagmamahal sa sarili kaya nga siguro maraming naaabuso ng mga partner nila, naabuso ng mga boss, naaabuso ng family and even friends.

Ano ano ba ginawa para ma-achieve ko ito? Disclaimer lang, this works for me in achieving both peace of mind and attaining my self love it may or may not work for you kasi magkakaiba naman tayo ng situation and personality like for me I was born with a very strong personality in choosing between flight or fight I would choose the latter, nonetheless ito ang aking tips pili ka nalang ng kaya mo i-apply kung medyo soft ang personality mo overkill kasi talaga yung iba sa list:

1. Less social media usage.

Knowing myself isa po kasi akong inggiterang froglet and sometimes it triggers insecurity kapag nakakakita ako ng mga highlights ng ibang tao sa social media, I mean hindi naman sa ayaw ko sila mag succeed pero siguro yung idea lang na "sana ako din" or mapapaisip ka nalang na sana may glass skin kadin ganern! So instead of self torture I make sure that I use this platform positively like para lang mag reconnect from time to time sa mga friendships ko or to share special or happy things currently happening with me.

2. I cut people off.

Ouch ang harsh ko ba?! As much as I would like to sugar coat it but it is the truth, in reality kasi whether we admit it or not may mga tao na masyadong toxic para sa ating mental health knowingly or unknowingly. Toxic relationships can cause a lot of self doubt and you may find yourself asking these questions:

"May poblema ba sakin? Saan ako nagkulang?"
"Ang tanga ko lang ba?"
"Bakit palagi nalang ako ginaganito mabuti naman akong tao diba?" 

So for me instead of staying in such toxic relationships regardless if it is coming from a coworker, a friend or even a family member I just choose to walk away. It doesn't mean na I hate them it's just that I hate how they make me feel and I believe I deserve better. 

3. I associate myself with positive individuals.

In connection sa nauna were in I walk away from people causing me pain I tend to stick with people who is more positive hindi important kung pareho kami ng belief sa lahat ng bagay because I love healthy debates, mas naging focus lang ako sa kung paano ba kapag kasama ko ang tao na to. I hate dramas, kasi isa yan sa binago kong pilit sa sarili ko ayoko ng issues gusto ko chill and ayoko mang mag discriminate basta hindi naman to in general mostly kasi with girls andameng eksena like hindi mo nasamahan sa banyo yung isa pero yung isa oo ay nako issue na yan enebeyen sis! So I keep myself away from those things kasi madami na tayong pwede poblemahin sa buhay yung mga ganyan di na dapat sinasama. I also hate negative chismis while I like talking about the positive one baka kasi sabihin nyo nagmamalis pako e chismosa din naman ako ha ha. Pwede naman kayo magchismisan ng tungkol sa sari sarili nyong buhay tulad ko I like to pour my heart out sa small group that I trust (because I have trust issues tackle natin next time!) or yung mga nagaganap sa showbiz at politics at least diba mas masaya kwentuhan. 

4. Productivity and Self improvement.

Before I was an overthinker and to avoid that sinisiguro ko na I am productive like right know mukha lang ako palaging naka cellphone pero di po ako nakikipag chat or nag-Facebook nagawa po ako ng blog LOL. Naniniwala kasi ako na being productive keeps your mind off of negative things I owe myself that at habang nagiging productive ako I am also improving myself like my blogging pasensya na po sa mga makakabasa na propesyonal kung hindi pumasa sa standard nyo ang blog ko kasi high-school pa ata year 2004 ng huli akong magsulat ng essay pak boom ayun lumalabas edad. Another new thing that I do is exercise opo nagpapa-abs si madam charot! kahit impossible kasi anlakas ko kumain ha ha pero I do it just to maintain my current weight and thanks kung ma lessen pa. Alam mo ba na ang page-excercise produces happy hormones called Dopamine? 

5. Learn, understand and accept my negative side. 

Ito siguro ang magiging pinaka challenging sa lahat ng mga matataas ang pride chicken ang isa isahin o tanggapin ang negative attributes natin. Mahalaga kasi ang self reflection nakasanayan kasi natin tignan ng tignan ang faults ng iba na minsan nakakalimutan na natin ang mga sarili nating issues kaya minsan our actions reveals our negative side. Reflect ka lang minsan try answering these questions:

• Anong ugali ko ba ang negative? 
• Bakit kaya ako naging ganun? 
• Paano ko ba matatanggap ang negative na ugali na ito para ma-improve ko? 

6. I try to keep my negative side in check.

Bigyan kita ng example dito. Halimbawa identified ko na ang isang negative attitude ko and followed yung instructions sa taas. Example I found out that I would usually say things without thinking which results to me hurting someone. So ngayon kahit gaano nakakainis ang sitwasyon nagpapaka Avatar Ang ang peg ng lola nyo kailangan calm and I would make sure to choose my words wisely para naman hindi ako makasakit but keep in mind na ang nature mo hindi yan nawawala kasi nature mo na nga iyan although naniniwala ako na it can be modified through nurture pero hindi totally mawawala. (See articles about nature vs nurture) 

7. I acknowledge my emotions.

Kapag nasasaktan ako I admit it immediately kaya sis kung nasaktan ka dahil naka move on na siya admit it char! At least kahit sa sarili mo manlang it takes your mind from wondering or defending your actions kung bakit ka gigil na gigil sa myday nya LOL. Kung hindi mo papansinin ang nararamdaman mo sino pa ang gagawa niyan para sayo? Be honest with yourself lalo na sa nararamdaman mo. 

8. I commend myself for my positive attitude and thoughts.

Purihin ang sarili kapag may nagagawang tama kahit simpleng "good job!" masarap mapansin ng iba ang iyong commendable attitude pero hindi all the time is may nakakakita so do yourself a favor and be your own fan! 

9. I remind myself that I am not a bad person.

We cannot always avoid mistakes or sometimes negative people kahit para silang bacteria na masarap tapunan ng antibiotics ay wala tayo magagawa kasi yun na ang mentality nila but don't make them weigh you down always remind yourself that you are a good person and remember God sees everything so be gentle and always choose to love yourself.

Thoughts to ponder 💭

Joshua 1:9
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.